 The echoes of the past silence the voice inside begging me to try again. Turmoil has profound sadness attached to its consequences. I don't get to decide how much pain I walk through, and my body tells the story of how deep the scars go. I ache for the life I knew because it was before I said goodbye a thousand more times. Goodbye to what I knew. Goodbye to friends more like family. Farewell to familiarity. So long to a million dreams buried deep within. It is a perpetual wake with the funeral in view. Waves of melancholy find their end only at the bottom of meaningless pursuits which excite the senses and postpone the inevitable.
Perhaps this is the place where sorrow is finally deep enough that I admit there is no where else to turn. This is where my deep conflict meets the loving embrace of the everlasting monarch whose one aim is to provide harmony...the Prince of Peace. I read words from John 14:27: Peace I leave with you, My peace I give to you; not as the world gives do I give to you. Let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid. I feel afraid. I feel troubled. I feel anxious. I feel frightened. My emotions tumble within me like a raging sea, begging for attention. If I was simply human, I would succumb to desperation. My soul knows I am not merely human. The peace giver has transformed my heart from stone to flesh. I am able to change, transform, renew. This is my new existence as a follower of the One who makes all things new. The eternal voice speaks over dry and barren places and declares He is making all things new, including my broken heart. I will get up again, I will make the hard choice to love again, trust again, hope again. My heart may break, and the echoes of the past may still whisper thoughts of despair, but I call this to mind, and therefore I have hope: The steadfast love of the LORD never ceases; his mercies never come to an end; they are new every morning; great is your faithfulness (Lamentations 3:21-23). - JLT #blog #peace #hope #faithfulness #God #Christian #blogger #july
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